by Brandy Edenfield
Talking with a young lady last week, I had the opportunity to share with her one of the most profound “nuggets” of truth God has ever dropped into my heart. I’ve gone back to it time and time again over the last several years and I’ve shared it with others many times. Maybe it will settle into your heart as it has in mine.
I was in a season of transition, just moved from Baton Rouge to Foley, left an amazing church and some incredible friends and wrapped up 18 mos. of heavy, hard inner work with my mentor counselor, Murphy Toerner. Murphy and I had worked through some major rejection issues and most freeing, we did a lot of work in the area of “religion” and legalism in my life and my family. I came to Foley free of so many heavy weights that had held me captive for years.
God strategically placed us in an environment that, no doubt, was where we were supposed to be, we felt certain, as a couple that this was right. But being in this place challenged every mindset shift I had about myself and who God truly was in my life. There was a heavy spirit of legalism and a strong push by our leadership to “perform” and “look the part” as a Christian. Oh how this stirred up turmoil in my spirit. I wanted to walk in the freedom I had found; yet I knew I was suppose to be in this place. Many days in those first few months, I cried out to God asking “How could you call me back to such oppression and suffocation?” Brian and I would pray and fast, yet the answer was always the same, “This is where I want you to be.”
One afternoon it felt especially overwhelming at a women’s luncheon. I was sitting in the most gorgeous setting, enjoying some food and fellowship with these ladies, and I felt COMPLETELY out of place! They were all soft spoken, meek, proper “church” women. And me? I’m loud, opinionated and outspoken. And I simply did not fit with these ladies. So I created an opportunity to excuse myself and proceeded to have a giant pity party for the rest of the day.
The next day, during a conversation with Murphy, I burst into tears and told her of my experience the day before and how I just didn’t fit in with these ladies. “They’re so churchy and sweet and proper and God just didn’t make me like that. Why? Why didn’t He make me soft? His word says ‘Blessed are the meek.’ If that’s what makes us blessed, why didn’t He give me that?” AND HERE COMES THE NUGGET!!!!
Murphy, in all her infinite wisdom, says to me (in her most maternal, loving voice) “Baby girl, He did. You just have a wrong idea of what ‘meek’ means. In the ancient Egyptian language, many years ago, they often used pictures to describe things instead of words (hieroglyphs). Honey, do you know what the beautiful picture for meek was?” Through sniffles, I said “No ma’am.” She said “The picture for meek was a velvet covered brick. Soft on the outside but strong and unbreakable on the inside. Your inner strength is that, powerful and bold. But your heart shows on the outside and it’s kind and gentle and trustworthy because it’s real and authentic. He didn’t create you to BE like anyone other than His son.”
A VELVET COVERED BRICK! This truth has set me free in ways that I can not fully express. I’m free to be who He created me to be and not what He created someone else to be. I hope this sets you free to be uniquely you too!