Blog by Brandy Edenfield
Lord, help my unbelief! So many things in this life that I don’t understand. So much heartbreak and loss all around us. So many tragedies that I struggle to reconcile with the loving God that I know you are. So many questions asked by your grief-stricken people and I can’t find any answer that makes their pain make sense.
I know about free will. I know that we live in a fallen world. I know you see a big picture that I can’t see. But Lord, though I “know about” these things, my flesh is crying out for an answer that will bring some relief to your broken children.
- Why do moms bury their babies?
- Why do children suffer at the hands of those who were supposed to protect them?
- Why do I live in freedom and plenty while so many others are oppressed and starving?
- Why does the evil prosper while the good survive on scraps?
- Why does a young husband wake up to feed his newborn baby, forever alone, b/c his perfectly healthy young bride “suffered complications” from the birth? WHY GOD? WHY?
You owe me no explanation, I know, but Father please help my questioning heart. I know you! I love you! I experience you daily! But, as I hear such pain and helplessness in the voice of your people, I struggle to understand.
I know all the “right answers” to these questions so please don’t comment “typically”, I just felt like someone reading this today needed to know that we all have questions. We all have parts of our faith that are weaker than others. Does this mean we are “lacking” or “less than” other believers? I don’t think so.
God knows my heart anyway so I may as well choose to be honest about my struggles, they don’t surprise or offend Him. In fact, I believe He honors honesty and loves teaching me when my heart genuinely says the following prayer from my heart:
“Lord, I love you enough to want more. More understanding. More wisdom. More compassion. More authenticity. More goodness. More love for others, especially the broken hearted. Ultimately, MORE OF YOU, LESS OF ME!” Father, soothe my heartbreak and weariness. Bless someone else through this word who feels all alone in their sadness and questions. Comfort them as only you can!”
2 Corinthians 1:3-5 MSG
“…God of all healing counsel! He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us.”